When life, with all its splendidly happy accidents, actually gives you watermelons (yay!) instead of sour lemons (boo!)
Possibly-true-but-awkwardly-unconfirmed Scenario Uno:
When a guy is genuine enough to make the most hardened of girls fall for him, that’s the moment I will yell “How dare you! Don’t you know how long I’ve spent developing the perfect system for never letting boys in? What makes you so different? What gives you the audacity to attempt such nonsense!”
To which he replies, “I guess, in this instance, there is no perfect answer that I can give to remedy this peculiar situation. All I know is, this is what I want for you as much as for myself.”
To which I say, “Screw you and your perfectly charming everything! Now, good sir, please consider my proposal: that we continue this rendezvous without sensational expectations and wild-eyed hopes.”
To which he concedes, “Anything for you.”
This is a beautiful quote.
She puts her hands on either side of my face, and the room falls away.
I have never gotten so lost in a kiss before. And then, the space between us explodes. My heart keeps missing beats and my hands cannot bring her close enough to me.
I taste her and realize I have been starving.
I have loved before, but it didn’t feel like this.
I have kissed before, but it didn’t burn me alive.
Maybe it lasts a minute, and maybe it’s an hour. All I know is that kiss, and how soft her skin is when it brushes against mine, and that even if I did not know it until now, I have been waiting for this person forever.
Now this is romance – so raw and unashamed.
I am feeling a very dark vibe tonight! Not because I am a horribly emo person, but because it brings an interesting balance to my I-am-so-chipper!-days.
Thinking back to the last time I ever loved a man, my fingertips made sweet sweet love to the matte black keys of my laptop.
And then this happened:
His love had stripped me of my armour. It was a starving pack of wolves. I was surrounded before I had even registered the danger, and quickly devoured before I could run.
It tore into my flesh, took chunks out of me.
I bled for him.
I still do.
Goodnight my sweet potatoes! (What did I say? Balance)
I’m not in love and I haven’t been for a very long time. It’s ancient history, baby, and I’m not sure if this is a good or bad situation to be in. But hey, this post is not about my love life hehe.
This post is for all the girls out there who are feeling lost in their relationships.
“What happened to the perfect couple that I built up in mind? We strayed so far from who we used to be. I mean, everything would be perfect if we could just go back to how it used to be.”
Yes, at one time or another, I’ve harboured all these crazy emotions in my overloaded cranium. Goodness, I’m glad it hasn’t happened for a lengthy amount of time because, well, emotional stress makes me very mopey and a little chubby :)
Its hard to pigeon-hole this post, but perhaps it is a culmination of the countless scribbled down thoughts that periodically spring into my mind during sleepless nights.
I suppose I’m posting this because it was a recent topic of conversation between a friend and I. After getting back from a month-long holiday, I had dinner with E to catch up on the thick and thins of our youth.
The subject was dating (naturally)… and after a long session of omnoming, venting and laughing, we both realised one thing: E and I are too neurotic to be one of those casually cool chicks who date mysterious men on and off. Its not us and it is not what makes us happy. Its not like we figured out the meaning of life here, but it was important to me because we were finally able to admit it.
That night I laid there in bed for hours, unable to sleep thanks to the awful side effects of a Varicella booster shot I got earlier in the afternoon. As I rubbed tiger balm into the aches of my shoulders, my mind wondered onto what my conversation with E made me realize.
When it comes to love, I want simplicity. Straightforwardness. No games.
I need someone who makes me feel more than they make me think.
I find that I am always over thinking things, and it sucks because I want my life to be about how each day and each person changes the way I live my life.
In order to do so I need to understand strength in patience and peace in forgiveness.
But what I think I need most is someone who needs me just as much as I need them. And for once in my life I will be unselfish.
Trust is highly flammable.
If I were you…
I wouldn’t play with fire.
Ramblings of the heart must always be tempered by the rationality of the mind.
Even then, things never go to plan.
Hello, hope you’ve been up to lots of mischief :)
I feel like today’s post has to be about failing relationships. I can’t avoid this topic because recently it’s just been seeping into my life. Luckily though, I myself have remained unscathed, but my friends haven’t faired so well.
It’s no secret how averse I am to serious relationships, so what happens when some of my best friends go through constant shit in their’s? Crazy cat lady in the making here…. [throws around a few cats]
So, as per my previous post, I’m up late on a coffee high!
After lying in bed for a good hour or two I’ve actually had quite a few revelations about the current state of my love life. Well, to be fair, it’s not entirely appropriate to use the word love. My life has been devoid of love for quite some time now and, up until recently, I had believed it to be fine.
To me love was all about laying yourself bare to another. Couldn’t handle it. Didn’t want to take the risk. I’m the last person you’d call trusting, especially when it comes to men, so when I stumble upon a genuinely nice guy I tend to ruin things by remaining closed off. I can’t pin-point the exact moment when my faith in love died but I will say that it can be resurrected. Surely it can.